I miss to teach

Lovely my new office...:) really??? This picture I took in my desk with the background is my boss (chief of Sub Director) office.
So, everyone can see that my desk exactly in front of my boss office. Wkwkwkwkwkwkwk......Allah SWT is very nice, remind me to work, not to play, right... :). Amin.
Move to new place/new job is very hard, especially if the new job is very very different with my last job. Teaching, I have been teaching for 7 years, and I think that is my life, even until now I think that I am still teaching. That's why I am still accept to give private tutoring to some students in Tugasku. I feel I can't let go my students...I feel jealous that I can't teach my students again...I feel so devastated. I always pray to Allah SWT that I hope I can still teaching even I work in DIKTI.
It is not about money or safety. Some people think that be a government employee is comfortable, because we get retired money, it is more safety etc. But for me, it is not about that reason.
My father want me to be a government employee which more safety. For this new job, I let go some of my plans/dreams.
And I feel very surprise with the new job in DIKTI . I feel not comfortable with the habit of time works. How can people start work at 9 am and go home at 7 pm or 9 pm? If you come in the morning and finish job from the beginning so you don't have go home late, right? but that's the habit here, why? Because in DIKTI, people have to make some rules for all of universities in Indonesia, so we have to invite lectures and discuss about the rules. We have to invite lectures (great lectures whose are very clever, concern about education, etc) from around Indonesia, so we have to waiting the lectures. They want to have meeting after they finish teach. They are good lectures, right? They are still thinking about their students. hmmmmm,......Allah SWT teach me again how to be patient.
Lot of things that I have to learn here, and I know it. I put my heart in this works so I can love this works, but my passion and my love for teaching is still in my mind.
So, I ask to my self, what activity actually that I want? but I remember, Allah SWT give the best for me, not what I want, because Allah SWT know what is the best for me sometimes not the ones I want.
I still remember how I want to get Japan scholarship but I failed and Allah SWT give other scholarship that was went to USA, thats the one better for me. And Allah SWT is right, Allah SWT give me good friends (a lot of good friends) and very wonderful memories. I learn a lot of things in USA.
I sent scholarship application to Australia last year but I failed and Allah SWT give me new job to be government employee that I know a lot of people want my new job....See how lucky I am and how very very GREAT ALLAH SWT. Amin.
I know how lucky I am..:) I am just greedy and want more from Allah SWT...Am I wrong? I am still human whose love to complain and feel not enough.....ha ha ha :D. But it is not about money.
I just still want love from my students....I still love teaching and I happy Allah SWT still allow me to still teaching my students. Even I have to fight with the time....time is not in my side (my feeling) now. Jakarta looks like want to eat me with the traffic jam.
I go home from my office already late and I still have to give private tutoring and I have to take 2.5 hours to get my students house. Again.....it is not about money, it is about my passion to teach, I feel like I am useful person if my students get high score because I teach them. if I think about money, actually money that I get from private tutoring just for cover the transport. Not enough for foods and the sore and aching of my body. It is not worthy if I count with money. BUT IT IS WORTHY with my feeling and my PASSION to make good next generation (candidate of my next leader, right? I always believe that I am teaching my next leader because my students will grow up and be better person to lead Indonesia..Bravo)
Activity? Which activity that I love? Very hard for me to choice to make happy my parents or do what I love.
Allah SWT guide me to do the best even I feel so tired because I go home late, even sometimes I feel scared to go home late but I know I have Allah SWT beside me. Amin.
MY STUDENTS remind me as a good teacher, okay? I ALWAYS LOVE YOU....I HOPE YOU ALWAYS SUCCESS.
Today I use clothes which 9B gave to me. Love you, my students. Can you see it 9B?